Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness~RIP CEH

October is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month. Who will you be lighting a candle for on October 15th?

This was copied from the online diary I had at the time this happened.....

July 17, 2007

my niece passed away this morning. she was barely 12 hours old. please keep my family in your prayers. i'd really appreciate it.

rip cheyenne

i'll update with more info later

*edit*

Crystal was in labor all day and around 8:30 pm they decided they were going to do an emergency c-section because Cheyenne's heart rate kept dropping. She was born at 8:42 and almost immediately respiratory was paged to the OR stat. She was having trouble breathing. After 15 minutes or so they decided she needed to be airlifted to Motts Childrens Hospital at UofM. Bryan and Crystal didn't even get to see her. Bryan did get to see her thru the nursery window that was it. Nick and I got out of there and dropped Nathan off at his parents so we could go to the hospital. We were about to get on 94 and head to Ann Arbor and Bryan called and said that she was going to Children's in Detroit now because Motts had no beds. He told us to just chill where we were because the helicopter hadn't arrived yet. We went home and got directions and waited. A little after 11 my dad called and said to go ahead and head to the hospital. We did and got there right after my brother. They said Cheyenne had only been there a couple of minutes. They showed us to the waiting room and said someone would come talk to us soon. o one came and talked to us. Bryan had to go back three times and ask three times before they told u s anything. At 2:30 they finally let Bryan, my parents and Nick and I back to the NICU and told us what was wrong. They said she had pneumothorax (basically a hole in her lung) and that they had to put a chest tube in her. Her lung was only holding 70% and they other 30% was floating around her little chest. She couldn't get the CO2 out of her body like she should have been. They said that had started to do an echo gram on her heart and had to stop because they had to focus on her little lungs. They were almost positive that her heart was fine though. They made it seem like there was hope. That worst case scenario she would be in the hospital for a couple pf weeks. They let us back to see her two at a time. She only weighed 4 pounds and 1 ounce. She was 12 inches long. She looked just like her daddy. Blond hair and blue eyes. She was beautiful. We were only allowed back for 5 minutes or so because they were going to put her on a different type of ventilator. We went back out to the waiting room and at that point Nick and I left. I was exhausted because I had worked midnights the night before and hadn't slept that day. So we go home and go to bed. My dad called me at 6:30 and said I needed to get back to the hospital because it wasn't looking good. They were even making arrangements to have Crystal transported there so she could see her baby. I balled the entire way to the hospital. I got there and my parents told me that they would be taking her off of the ventilator soon. Come to find out she had no lungs, just lung tissue. And you can't do anything to make someone grow lungs. She had no chance from the get go. They just kept her alive long enough so her mommy could see her. My parents took me back and it was the saddest thing I have ever seen in my life. As soon as Bryan saw me he hugged me and we both just balled. Crystal was on a gurney holding her baby and crying. My heart just broke. We all just stood there and hugged each other and cried. She was baptised by the chaplain and then hey took the grandparents and myself to another room so Bryan and Crystal could spend some time with her alone before the took her off the vent. After that they brought Bryan and Crystal to us and said they would bring the baby shortly. Cheyenne was still alive when they brought her in and gave her to Crystal. She only lasted a couple of minutes after that if that. We all got to hold her and we took a ton of pictures. I made sure to get a family picture of the 3 of them. Then they just took her away. It was the most heartbreaking thing I have ever seen. I feel so bad for my brother and Crystal. After a little while the chaplain brought in some stuff. They had made foot and hand impressions in clay and framed it and put the name tag that was on her bassinet on the back. They also put the sleeper they dressed her in before we all got to hold her, and the bonnet and her blankets into a heart shaped box for them to keep. After that we headed home. I went home and got Nick (they sent him home from work when they found out what happened) and went to the hospital to see if there was anything we could do. We ended up going to a funeral home to get some information as far as how much it would cost. Thankfully they don't have to worry about that because my parents are buying the casket and Crystal's dad is paying for the rest.

My heart goes out to anyone else who has had to endure losing a baby. I know I didn't suffer as bad as my brother & his girlfriend but it still hurt alot. I was pregnant with Colin and had him 2 weeks later. I was so looking forward to Colin & Cheyenne growing up together.